Wisdom and Folly from this side of nslSue's Life

2012-02-07T18:31:00.000-08:00

Miracle Moments-Mom’s Internment
February 6, 2012

Miracle Moments are something learned about when Mike
passed away. Little events, “coincidences”,
that are beyond just chance that say in a profound way, “I am with you- I am
OK- I love you.” There were many of those yesterday.

When Rick and I arrived at Westminster Memorial Park on
Monday, February 6, 2012, having given Mom her last car ride- buckled in the
front seat with me in the back- just as it always was, we were surprised to find
her site beautifully canopied with chairs set up and a table for her urn. I felt an immediate need for worship music- and especially to play “The Old Rugged Cross” so I sat in the car, called Mary Rose to find out how to download Pandora and search for “The Old Rugged Cross”. I downloaded OK but could not come up with “The Old Rugged Cross” but finally accepted worship music and went to the grave site. I found that both Mom and Dad’s
marker and Aunt Kate’s had been polished again and looked shiny and almost new
and they had neatly trimmed around both markers. . I also saw that they had finally found the
vase in the grass and had uncovered it and placed the flowers that we left
Saturday in it. I was touched.

The young man from Westminster backed off and simply
said, “Take all the time you want.” At one point he commented ‘“Your Mom liked Christian Music?’ I said that she did but I really was looking for “The Old Rugged Cross”. He, being
younger than I, took my phone to try to find it to no avail. Rick prayed for us, we wept and listened to the worship music.

After some time we told the young man that it was OK to bring the grounds crew to do the burial. I thought of Mike as once he was one of these crew members-a bit of a
tough job. They were very respectful as they exposed the pre-dug hole and place Mom on top of Dad’s casket- the Celtic Cross facing skyward. They placed
shovels full of dirt on top and with the very last shovel full that filled the grave,
“The Old Rugged Cross” came on Pandora. I burst into tears. The young man, who is
shortly to leave for Boston to study for the Priesthood, said, “Your Mom wanted
to wait until this moment- some things are just meant to be.” We listened to the song as they placed the sod and immediately afterwards “Amazing Grace” played...and of course, Grandma
Janet came to our hearts. Two songs after that was “His Eye is on the Sparrow”- the song Deven sang at Grandpa Rae’s funeral- I had not heard that song before and not again until yesterday. Take the time to listen to it- the words are beautiful and a comfort.

So—after more tears, a visit with Marmee and Grandee, and a last good-bye to Mom and Dad, we left the park. As we were at the exit gate, the radio on in the car, the announcer said, “This day’s theme is- Let Go and Let God”-one of Mom's life sayings. In tears we looked at each other and could only exclaim, “Really?”

Rick took me to Polly’s Pie Palace for breakfast—our server was Charlie! Not such a common name these days.

At the end of the day- before our flight home, Rick, Mary Rose and I went to Newport pier to watch the sunset. Mom loves the ocean and sunsets- as do I. It was beautiful and peaceful. We decided we had just enough time to get a fast dinner before leaving for the airport so we would just get whatever was at the end of the pier. The choices at the end of the pier??? Charlie’s Chili and Jane’s Corndogs!!! Really?
We choose Charlie’s Chili and from my seat I looked up and they had a
Fire station/firefighter sign on the wall. Really?

I don’t know what all to make of these “Miracle Moments”
but in my heart I feel we were being reassured that Mom, Dad and Mike and are together,
still loving all of us, and at peace in their new eternal home.

"Amazing Grace" July 1, 2011

2011-07-12T09:47:00.000-07:00

Celebration of the Life of Janet Woolington Simonson
July 10, 2011

Phil. 4:8-9

And now, brothers, as I close this letter let me say one more thing: Fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and dwell on the fine, good things in others. Think about all you can Praise God for and be glad about it. Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and saw me doing and the God of peace will be with you.”

These words were book marked and underlined in Janet’s Bible—the first verses I read shortly after she passed from this life. It, to me, embodied all I knew Janet to be in the 43 years I knew her as a mother-in-law, mentor and friend. These verses embodied especially what she shared with me the last week of her life.

I was privileged to be one of those to be able to be by Janet’s side in her last days, honored to share intimate moments with her and be enriched by her words of wisdom and abiding faith in Christ.

On Monday we thought we had lost her…I am convinced that on that day she was given a glimpse of Heaven. Later that day she was exclaiming, “WOW—WOW—WOW”. I asked, “What is WOW?” She responded, “It was so surprising, so surprising.” I asked her if she had gone somewhere. She quickly responded, “Yes”. I asked her to tell me about it and she told me, “There was Light, Light…and …Freedom”. I asked her if she thought she saw Heaven and with a tender smile she responded, “I think so…”.

Another time, as she was saying, “Let me go…please let me go”. In attempt to make sure we were not misunderstanding her intent, Rick asked, “Go where Mom?” She paused, almost incredulous, opened her eyes and in a firm voice said, “Heaven of course!!”

Janet had so much to share that last week:

* She told Carleen, “Love Makes the Path Straight.”

* She told my children, “Spread your talents around.”

* Of the little children, likely her favorite group of people, she said "The little children—they are the best—their minds are just discovering. I love the little children.”

One of her most fervent messages was, “Each One Teach One”. Over and over again she told us, “Each one teach one.” Seeming to want to be certain we got the message and it’s importance.
The day she was welcomed into Heaven, afterwards, I took a walk along the beach with my children. Stephen started digging for sand crabs. A young boy-about the age of 11- asked Stephen to teach him how to dig for sand crabs. Stephen took the time to teach him and be sure he was successful. We continued our walk and later returning to the same spot, we saw that same young boy teaching 2 younger boys to catch sand crabs! The 11 year old yelled to Stephen, “Look- I caught a big one!”
As the rest of us watched, we all said, “Each One Teach One…this one is for you Grandma!”

One of the times I was alone with her, she told me, as she was pulling off her oxygen mask, “Medicine is NOT an exact science.” She then chuckled slightly and I asked her, “Are you cracking yourself up?” Janet quipped back, “Sometimes you just have to crack yourself up!!!”

On Monday, when Janet was struggling through this transition of her life, I leaned close to her ear and quietly began to sing, “Amazing Grace.” And immediately she calmed and began singing along with me, knowing words and verses I had forgotten. She sang from the depths of her soul. For the next four days that song carried her through. At times of agitation we learned that she was asking for us to sing “Amazing Grace” again. In the last hours of her life, when she could hardly speak- her voice still rang clear with the words, “And Grace Will Lead me Home.”

She prayed often those last days and asked often for prayer. “Take my Hand, set me Free” she would pray. Jesus was her Light. She asked Him to show her “The Way” and He did. She wanted her family to know of her Faith in Jesus Christ, her Lord and Savior. He is the LOVE that makes the crooked path straight.

I was with Janet, holding her hand, as she drew her last breath- peacefully in the Huntington Beach condo she so longed to return to, --- the Grace of God Led Her Home.

How deeply pleased Janet, Great Janet, Grandma Janet, Mother, Sister and Friend, would be to hear her Great Granddaughter Madeline, Granddaughter Mary Rose, son-in-law Robert Henry and Grandson Deven Simonson sing “Amazing Grace”. Listen prayerfully to the words. They are her words and her message to all of us from a wonderful woman who lived her own life with “Amazing Grace.”

I Love you ,

Sue

Save a Place for me Brother

2011-06-08T08:37:00.000-07:00

One year ago today, June 7, 2011 my brother, Mike McGroarty, graduated to heaven. I was by his side, holding his hand as he left. I am forever changed, living with a constant ache in my heart, but rejoice that he now lives free from pain in the Light of our Lord. I just miss him.

Tilly's 2nd Birthday

2011-05-18T10:15:00.000-07:00

Customize your own photo slideshow

La Habra 4th of July 2010 Pt. 1

2011-01-17T18:37:00.000-08:00

Go to marker 6 - this firework show- 4th of July 2010- was dedicated to my brother. He would have been so proud and pleased!

Simple Truths - We Hope You Enjoyed the movie!

2010-12-22T08:28:00.000-08:00

Dedicated to my Brother Mike who lived his "dash" well. Please take the time to listen and reflect. I know it made me think.

Simple Truths - We Hope You Enjoyed the movie!

I miss you Brother ....

2010-12-07T12:04:00.000-08:00

For my brother who went home 6 months ago today and all of us who miss him to the depths of our souls...we grieve... but not without HOPE.
I Love You
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcYRr1dk7wA

TVKim- Watching: Kim on Komand- Prevent your teens from sexting

2010-08-13T16:22:00.000-07:00

TVKim- Watching: Kim on Komand- Prevent your teens from sexting

Words about my Brother

2010-06-22T18:00:00.001-07:00

June 19, 2010

My Brother

Sue McGroarty Simonson

“Some men leave their mark on the world by the way they live and the difference they make in the lives they touch” I stand here today overwhelmed by the numbers and depth with which my brother touched lives

world-wide.

I’m Mike’s “lit’l sis”- I’ve known him my entire life! He was the brother who spent years trying to convince me I was adopted, that told our Mom when I was 13 to let me wear make-up because “Really Mom, she needs it!” He was the brother all my girlfriends wanted to be around because he was so “dreamy” and they carried secret crushes on him. He was the bass player in the band “So Rare” and I loved listening to him practice in the garage. The bass he played then, 45 years ago, is the same bass being played today by his nephew.

He was crowned “Coed King” in high school, led the marching band as the drum major and truthfully was always a bit of a pyromaniac at home.

As we became adults, we grew to be closer friends. I remember one particularly hard time in my life when he called and reached my soul as he said, “I love you, sis, you know that, I love you.”

He never lost his humor, even as the pain from cancer became excoriating. I cherish hearing him quip with the hospice nurse, just 3 weeks ago, as she explained their services which included pet therapy. Mike immediately exclaimed, “Pet therapy that is great because our dog really needs some therapy!”!

My brother, the hero, was a very humble man and I count that as one of his most cherished characteristics. He has done so much, served so many, faced non- ending danger, including his cancer, had so many adventures, b

ut to him…it was just what he did—no bragging, no drawing attention to himself-just humble—which is the mark of a true hero.

In May of 1997, Mike wrote to our family:

“After you take a deep breath or two, I want you to look at the newspaper, go to the mall, walk down your street or anyone’s street. And tell me what you see. Look at these people closely, brush aside your feelings for just a brief moment. Where has God put you in the great picture of life? Tell me if you don’t feel lucky, you don’t feel special and life isn’t fair. When I get sad or angry abo

ut something or someone and start feeling that I am not getting a break, I start thinking of all those folks I have had the opportunity to help, to comfort or just pick up when they fell. I say to myself, I really don’t have it that bad compared to the these other folks. I guess I should start looking at the other side of sadness and depression and start telling myself how lucky I am to have what I have. I will share a story on Friday with a bunch of young folks that won’t fully understand the feelings and emotions of what 169 families where forced to go th

rough 2 years ago and are having to re-live again during the trial of the people that caused those emotions.

I will get off my soapbox, however it is not over until the fat lady sings, and I have not seen the fat lady hanging out lately. So you see, there is nothing to worry about- It is OK to be tired---it is OK to rest---But we can’t stop doing our jobs. Everyone is in this together.”

His words from 1997 are words I feel certain he is telling us all today.

I cannot end without sharing the amazing love I observed between Mike and DeeDee. I would come to their home and find joy in just listening to them laughing together-even through the struggles of cancer, there was laughter and love. Of their love I can say- you never really knew where one ended

and the other began.

One year ago I had the privilege of being baptized with my brother by my son in his son’s pool. What a glorious moment we shared as we were able to proclaim our shared faith in the resurrected Christ, our Lord and Savior.

Mike had a favorite hymn throughout his years- The Old Rugged Cross-the chorus reads:

“So I’ll cherish the old rugged cross till my trophies at last I lay down. I will cling to that old rugged cross and exchange it someday for a crown

.”

Mike –You have that crown now and His Glory forever you share.

I love You, I miss you—I will see you again in Glory.

IF

2010-06-22T17:40:00.000-07:00

This writing was given to my brother Mike by our Dad as he was about to marry Dee Dee. Mike in turn gave it to his son Michael C. as he became a man.
It was read by Rick at Mike's memorial service to share how Mike live his life and the lessons he passed down to us all-
If
By Rudyard Kipling
If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies, Or, being hated, don't give way to hating, And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise; If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with triumph and disaster And treat those two imposters just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools; If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breath a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on"; If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch; If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds' worth of distance run - Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

Chief Mike McGroarty- 9/2/1949-6/7/2010

2010-06-22T17:31:00.000-07:00

Mike's Life
By Ryan Miller

J. Michael McGroarty, 60, who braved disasters around the country and world to protect the lives of thousands and educated others to protect the lives of countless more, died in his Corona, Calif., home on June 7, 2010, after a hard-fought battle with prostate cancer.
Mike was born Sept. 2, 1949, in Los Angeles to Charles and Jane McGroarty. He graduated from Pacifica High School in Garden Grove, then achieved a bachelor’s degree in public administration from the University of La Verne. He also held associate’s degrees in fire technology and paramedical science from Rancho Santiago College, as well as a Lifetime California Community College teaching credential.
He gave 27 years of service to the La Habra Fire Department (including 10 years as an emergency medical technician-paramedic, six years as a captain, eight years as a battalion chief, and seven years as fire chief), then retired in 2001 to provide the state the benefit of his lifesaving expertise through the California Governor’s Office of Emergency Services. His titles and the programs he led are too numerous to list, but included the State Urban Search and Rescue Response Program, the State/National Urban Search and Rescue Training Program, terrorism and weapons of mass destruction-related operations, flood and swift water rescues, and Hazmat operations planning.
When large-scale tragedy struck, Mike’s expertise saved lives. He instructed in rescue operations for California’s Office of the State Fire Marshal, the California Office of Emergency Services, and the FEMA Urban Search and Rescue Response System Advanced Task Force. He developed statewide incident management guidelines, consulted on safety protocol, and designed disaster contingency plans for businesses.
Over the years, he responded to emergency situations near and far, including the Leninakan earthquake in Soviet Armenia; the Loma Prieta earthquake; Hurricane Emily; the Northridge earthquake; and the Oklahoma City Federal Building Bombing.
He cited his most memorable response as coordinating the first wave of California’s Urban Search and Rescue task forces sent to New York City on Sept. 11, 2001. His work there integrated New York Fire Department and FEMA rescue efforts in the face of confusion and extremely hazardous conditions.
Mike retired from the Office of Emergency Services in 2004 and began work as a contract instructor for large-scale disaster incident management.
Mike McGroarty is survived by Dee McGroarty, his one true love and wife of 40 years; son Mike and daughter-in-law Destiny McGroarty; daughter Kelly McGroarty; granddaughter Brittany Sherman; grandson Garrett McGroarty; mother Jane McGroarty; sister Katee Cross; and sister Sue Simonson.
True to his proud Irish heritage, Mike valued love, friendship, and loyalty—characteristics he revealed to all who met him. He was often described simply as a hero.
In lieu of flowers, please send memorial contributions in Mike’s name to City of Hope (cityofhope.org) or the National Disaster Search Dog Foundation (searchdogfoundation.org).

December 1st Family Celebration

2009-12-01T11:49:00.000-08:00

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Calming Baby

2009-10-29T13:33:00.000-07:00

http://www.news10.net/video/default.aspx?maven_playerId=immersiveplayer&maven_referralPlaylistId=1274333a64a5d7e45e434dd91191c8e94a1234b7&maven_referralObject=1312370300

There is hope! Easy calming techniques. See http://www.without-regret.org/ for classes!

Happy Anniversary Miller Lovebirds!

2009-10-16T12:41:00.000-07:00

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Rosh Hashanah

2009-09-19T10:10:00.001-07:00

Make a Smilebox greeting

2009-09-02T17:58:00.000-07:00

Make a Smilebox greeting

Who Packed Your Parachute?

2009-08-29T15:04:00.000-07:00

Who Packed Your Parachute?
An excerpt from Aim for the Heart
By Tom Mathews

I want to share this excerpt as a way of thanking all those who have "packed my parachute"- been there for me to uphold me, support me and encourage me through all the ups and downs of life. Sometimes, it is even someone I barely know. Others, it is life time friends and family.

This is also my reminder to self: to take care to help pack other's parachutes for if I am not doing that, what am I doing here in the first place? I so easily can get caught up in my “poor me" syndrome in this stage of my life-instead I need to seek those who need help with their parachutes of life!

*******************************************************************
By the way- the two in the photo are my Mom and Dad, both pilots, as their love story began. Thanks for helping to pack my parachute of life!
*******************************************************************

Captain Charles Plumb, a graduate from the Naval Academy, plane, after 74 successful combat missions over North Vietnam, was shot down. He parachuted to safety, but was captured, tortured and spent 2,103 days in a small box-like cell.After surviving the ordeal, Captain Plumb received the Silver Star, Bronze Star, the Legion of Merit and two Purple Hearts, and returned to America and spoke to many groups about his experience and how it compared to the challenges of everyday life.Shortly after coming home, Charlie and his wife were sitting in a restaurant. A man rose from a nearby table, walked over and said, "You're Plumb! You flew jet fighters in Vietnam from the aircraft carrier Kitty Hawk. You were shot down!"Surprised that he was recognized, Charlie responded, "How in the world did you know that?" The man replied, "I packed your parachute." Charlie looked up with surprise. The man pumped his hand, gave a thumbs-up, and said, "I guess it worked!"Charlie stood to shake the man's hand, and assured him, "It most certainly did work. If it had not worked, I would not be here today."Charlie could not sleep that night, thinking about the man. He wondered if he might have seen him and not even said, "Good morning, how are you?" He thought of the many hours the sailor had spent bending over a long wooden table in the bottom of the ship, carefully folding the silks and weaving the shrouds of each chute, each time holding in his hands the fate of someone he didn't know.Plumb then began to realize that along with the physical parachute, he needed mental, emotional and spiritual parachutes. He had called on all these supports during his long and painful ordeal.

Who Packed Your Parachute? Whose Parachute are you packing?

Happy 33/13 Wedding Anniversary

2009-07-06T11:02:00.000-07:00

Make a Smilebox photobook

They Are Only Little for Awhile...

2009-06-20T22:26:00.000-07:00

As I was driving home from my 10 days in SLO with Tilly Jane, Hattie Rose and Sarah and Ryan, tears streamed down my cheeks as I listened to the song, "Let them be Little"--and I knew the truth of how fast these years go by and become like a whisper in the wind- not even sure it ever even happened. Yet, I had been reminded how difficult these days can be with two little ones, no time to yourself, always serving the needs of these little beings that are totally dependant on you for everything... I want to cry out- cherish each moment, each hug, even each temper tantrum and wakeful night-- but can you when you are exhausted and in the midst of it all??? ..."for they are only that way for awhile".

I will miss the early morning quiet times, the singing of "Tell me Why", the "I love You- miss yous", the little impy moments, the daily changes...and I am sad I am not closer to help Sarah and Ryan in the stress of it all- as raising a family is stressful ...

But it is also joyous like no other time in life. I came to realize that I don't think we were meant to live as independent families but we were created to live in extended family community as we all really do need each other- to be that village that helps and supports in raising these precious little ones. How is it that our life has become so mobile, so isolated from one another?

Even Uncle Deven fell in love with these two precious ones and longs to spend more time- to be silly together and have adventures. He found a bond- one that is meant to be among nieces and Uncles.

Mornings were some of my most special times- as Sarah could sleep or get other things done and Hattie had her breakfast next me as I held Tilly- quiet moments-precious memories.

But we all stretch and do what life demands- making the best of the situations we have- but I can long for a simpler time. When families were close together, they could run over to help when needed, laugh over a funny moments, have a cup of coffee together- watch those precious little people grow and learn and love.

Tilly Jane- one Month old

Miss Hattie Rose Turns Two!

2009-06-20T19:31:00.001-07:00

YEAH! Hattie Rose turned 2 on June 14, 2009. She is all you would expect from 2- energetic, curious, creative, gentle and loving, funny, a bit sneaky, and definitely testing her boundaries (and exhausting her parents!). She is a JOY!

And what 2 year old wouldn't want a SUSHI PARTY!!!!! Yes- you read right. Hattie LOVES SUSHI and sushi she had- real sushi, cake made to look like sushi (a brillant invention of her Mother's!), rice krispy treats made to look like sushi, sushi party favors and Asian decorations and other Asian snacks! It was amazing and delicious and appreciated by all- even all the 2 year olds! I would recommend the idea for a party for any age. Actually it was one of the most relaxed, coordinated (perfectly coordinated -Aunt Dee Dee would be proud!), and delicious party I have attended!

The party was done in a park which made for lots to do for the children, and easy clean up. Hattie was gracious and appreciative of all gifts- and was the perfect little hostess! I think Sarah should write a book on kid's parties!! I was so glad to have been there!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HATTIE!!!

Happy Anniversary to Stephen and Michelle

2009-06-18T23:00:00.000-07:00

Make a Smilebox greeting

The Folly of Wisdom

2009-06-07T07:29:00.000-07:00

So...is it the beginning of wisdom when you finally realize that you live in a state of folly?

It surely doesn't feel that way but I see a glimmer that that may be the opening door of wisdom.

I've lived my life purposefully (as much as I could) - consciously making major decisions with one foot in the grave--will this matter in the long run of life, will this matter in the generations to come, will this matter in eternity? As I looked at raising a family, it was done with these things in mind-what was true and lasting and important-love of God, relationship and love of others and of self. When one is young- all things seem possible and energy is seemingly endless. It didn't matter that creating traditions took time, nights without sleep to prepare the best surprises or keep up the newly found traditions that would give the message of love, relationship, God and family.

One such incidence was the crazy notion that I must be at my Dad's Birthday (81st?) to show him how important he was to me and to show our children the importance of family, no matter the cost. We packed up our small children early in the morning to be in Anaheim by dinner to celebrate with him and we had to leave the next morning to be back for an appointment in Sacramento. It was a feat, but family was that important! I'll never forget, after the long drive with small children, ringing my parent's doorbell, awaiting the surprise and the hugs from my Dad, to only be greeted with, "Oh, I didn't know you were coming- did you read the newspaper today?" I was dumbfounded- I hugged Dad and said , "Dad, we drove all the way from Sacramento to surprise you for your birthday." This lack of enthusiasm was uncharacteristic, I knew that, but still it hurt, so after our brief hug, I excused myself and went into the back bedroom and broken-heartedly cried.

Was this folly? To work so hard to love, to build memories, to enrich relationship ...only to be asked if I had read the paper today? Where is the wisdom? Is the very effort folly? (I know it was insanely crazy but was it folly?) One thinks... I thought... when I was a young Mom, I knew what was really important with one foot in the grave...but did I? Did I pour my life into folly? These are the questions on this side of life. More important...what shall I know to be true wisdom? One of the guiding sayings I kept present as our 4 children were growing up was, "Teach them always to gain in wisdom and in grace.." Now, on this side of life, it seems ironic- for what do I know of wisdom? I am just now getting a glimpse of folly. With the psalmist I pray, "Behold, Thou dost desire truth in the innermost being, And in the hidden part Thou will make me know wisdom." ps 51:6

This is my prayer,

but for now,

I am thinking that, just maybe,

folly is the gatekeeper of wisdom.

2009-05-29T11:08:00.000-07:00

The extrodinary wisdom from this side of life I have to share today is...

PedEgg (as seen on TV) works!

I have happy feet!

The Amazing 1.5 Weeks!

2009-05-26T12:41:00.000-07:00

It is the events of this past 1.5 weeks that caused me to set up a blog in the first place. So much happened-joyous events- that, in all humbleness, took super-human tactics and strength from the "Invisible Mom" (with the positive help of Dad) to pull off! As I reflected on all that had happened, I didn't want to loose it in what I am starting to recognize as the fading of memory! May 16, 2009 marked the graduation Stephen (25) from William Jessup University with a BA-Cum Laude-in counseling psychology, Bible and Theology. When he married Michelle, one of his promises to her parents is that he would finish his education. Being man of integrity, he did just that as a married man, holding down a full-time job and is looking forward to getting a Psy-D in marriage and family counseling. He does and will touch and positively impact so many families with his insight, wisdom and guidance.

Back to the story--3 days before Carleen and Grandma Janet arrived from So Ca, the next day Michelle's parents arrived from New York and the next day we flew Deven in as a graduation surprise for Stephen. In the meantime, Mary Rose was finishing up her sophomore year at WJU and moving home! As one big happy family, we attended Stephen's Baccalaureate service on Friday night and graduation on Saturday morning and returned home for a typical Simonson celebration with friends, family and LOTS of food. We had worked WEEKS (and Rick through back pain from a recent car accident) to beautify our back yard only to be greeted with 100 degree weather and the neccessity to stay inside in our one air conditioned room! But celebrate we did!

The next day, Sunday, as we were returning from the airport and dropping off our house guests, we got a call from Sarah and Ryan. Due to concern for the new baby yet to be born (low amniotic fluid, high blood pressure, low fetal movement), it was decided Sarah should be induced that day. So home to pack for Mary Rose and I and off to SLO to help with the events of birth (mostly as Hattie's support). We arrived in SLO at 1am on Monday and Hattie woke up the Grandma and Auntie Rose at home and Mom and Dad in the hospital (a change from the homebirth plan). At 9:30am we got the call that contractions were increasing and at noon we got the call to be stand-by and by 2pm we were in the hospital parking lot at the ready and by 3:30pm Tilly Jane Miller came into the world in her very own unique way (I'll save that for another blog!) with Dad, Hattie Rose, Auntie Rose, and Grandma in attendance! A truly BEAUTIFUL little girl with dimples charmed us all from the very beginning!

The next couple of days were spent cleaning and preparing until Grandpa Rick came on Thursday and it was off to So Ca to prepare for Deven's college graduation!

Arriving at Aunt Bunny's, who generously opened her home to us, around midnight on Thursday and Friday was entirely shopping for the grad party and restocking all the decorations I had left in Sac in me rush to leave for the birth! Deven graduated from Cal State Fullerton with a BA in Theater Arts for which he gave his hear and soul and became a stronger man for it. Saturday was the event with another Simonson celebration with LOTS of food,m family and friends back at Aunt Bunny's (she is a bit sainted to allow us to invade her home). What a delight to see family we haven't seen in years and some we hadn't even met! What a celebration of Deven's accomplishments and each one was rewarded with one, or several, of Deven's infamous hugs!

But wait...there's more!
The next morning-early- we gathered at Michael C's home- just a small group- Kelly, Brittany, Mike, Dee Dee, Aunt Bunny, Stephen and Michelle, Rick , Deven and Mary Rose and me- as Mike and I were baptized in acknowledgement of our love and commitment to our Lord, Jesus Christ. We were profoundly honored to be baptized by Stephen. Having been a Christian myself since I was 18, I had never made the decision to be re-baptized as an adult who accepted Christ as my Savior. I knew this was the moment-this is what I had waited for-to be baptized with my brother and by my son. It was deeply meaningful, joyous and inspiring.

So- in a week and one half- my two son's graduated from college, my second granddaughter was born and I was baptized with my brother- each with celebrations of their own! That 1.5 weeks seemed like months - I am exhausted but profoundly grateful and humbled, and like Mary of the Bible, I will long ponder these things in my heart.

Baptism 2009

2009-05-25T17:19:00.001-07:00

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Invisible Mom

2009-05-25T16:52:00.000-07:00

It seems I have been drawn into this "other side" of life without preparation nor expectation. It came on cat's feet, quiet and unassuming, and left me in a daze, searching for understanding. All I poured my life into- my family consisting a wonderful, yet complex, husband, and four amazing children, suddenly drifted off on the whisper of the wind -save my husband with whom I search in the quiet which has become our home, for a focus and meaning to "this side of life"! This reading which I shared at church this Mother's Day, brought insight and understanding to what has been and what is to be for me- a mother with four grown children exercising those wings we worked so many years to strengthen. I hope to whoever may need it, this will also bring you clarity to wherever you may be in this fleeting thing called life.

Invisible Mother......
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store.
Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'Obviously, not.
No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.
I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated sum a cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going; she's going; she is gone!One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England ..
Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in.
I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself.
I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.'
It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe ..
I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription:
'To My Dear Friend, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.' In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:
No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.
These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.
They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything. A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.' And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place.
It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life.
It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on.
The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree. When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'you're going to love it there.'As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.