They Are Only Little for Awhile...

As I was driving home from my 10 days in SLO with Tilly Jane, Hattie Rose and Sarah and Ryan, tears streamed down my cheeks as I listened to the song, "Let them be Little"--and I knew the truth of how fast these years go by and become like a whisper in the wind- not even sure it ever even happened. Yet, I had been reminded how difficult these days can be with two little ones, no time to yourself, always serving the needs of these little beings that are totally dependant on you for everything... I want to cry out- cherish each moment, each hug, even each temper tantrum and wakeful night-- but can you when you are exhausted and in the midst of it all??? ..."for they are only that way for awhile".

I will miss the early morning quiet times, the singing of "Tell me Why", the "I love You- miss yous", the little impy moments, the daily changes...and I am sad I am not closer to help Sarah and Ryan in the stress of it all- as raising a family is stressful ...

But it is also joyous like no other time in life. I came to realize that I don't think we were meant to live as independent families but we were created to live in extended family community as we all really do need each other- to be that village that helps and supports in raising these precious little ones. How is it that our life has become so mobile, so isolated from one another?


Even Uncle Deven fell in love with these two precious ones and longs to spend more time- to be silly together and have adventures. He found a bond- one that is meant to be among nieces and Uncles.

Mornings were some of my most special times- as Sarah could sleep or get other things done and Hattie had her breakfast next me as I held Tilly- quiet moments-precious memories.

But we all stretch and do what life demands- making the best of the situations we have- but I can long for a simpler time. When families were close together, they could run over to help when needed, laugh over a funny moments, have a cup of coffee together- watch those precious little people grow and learn and love.

Tilly Jane- one Month old

Miss Hattie Rose Turns Two!

YEAH! Hattie Rose turned 2 on June 14, 2009. She is all you would expect from 2- energetic, curious, creative, gentle and loving, funny, a bit sneaky, and definitely testing her boundaries (and exhausting her parents!). She is a JOY!

And what 2 year old wouldn't want a SUSHI PARTY!!!!! Yes- you read right. Hattie LOVES SUSHI and sushi she had- real sushi, cake made to look like sushi (a brillant invention of her Mother's!), rice krispy treats made to look like sushi, sushi party favors and Asian decorations and other Asian snacks! It was amazing and delicious and appreciated by all- even all the 2 year olds! I would recommend the idea for a party for any age. Actually it was one of the most relaxed, coordinated (perfectly coordinated -Aunt Dee Dee would be proud!), and delicious party I have attended!

The party was done in a park which made for lots to do for the children, and easy clean up. Hattie was gracious and appreciative of all gifts- and was the perfect little hostess! I think Sarah should write a book on kid's parties!! I was so glad to have been there!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HATTIE!!!

Happy Anniversary to Stephen and Michelle

Make a Smilebox greeting

The Folly of Wisdom

So...is it the beginning of wisdom when you finally realize that you live in a state of folly?

It surely doesn't feel that way but I see a glimmer that that may be the opening door of wisdom.

I've lived my life purposefully (as much as I could) - consciously making major decisions with one foot in the grave--will this matter in the long run of life, will this matter in the generations to come, will this matter in eternity? As I looked at raising a family, it was done with these things in mind-what was true and lasting and important-love of God, relationship and love of others and of self. When one is young- all things seem possible and energy is seemingly endless. It didn't matter that creating traditions took time, nights without sleep to prepare the best surprises or keep up the newly found traditions that would give the message of love, relationship, God and family.

One such incidence was the crazy notion that I must be at my Dad's Birthday (81st?) to show him how important he was to me and to show our children the importance of family, no matter the cost. We packed up our small children early in the morning to be in Anaheim by dinner to celebrate with him and we had to leave the next morning to be back for an appointment in Sacramento. It was a feat, but family was that important! I'll never forget, after the long drive with small children, ringing my parent's doorbell, awaiting the surprise and the hugs from my Dad, to only be greeted with, "Oh, I didn't know you were coming- did you read the newspaper today?" I was dumbfounded- I hugged Dad and said , "Dad, we drove all the way from Sacramento to surprise you for your birthday." This lack of enthusiasm was uncharacteristic, I knew that, but still it hurt, so after our brief hug, I excused myself and went into the back bedroom and broken-heartedly cried.

Was this folly? To work so hard to love, to build memories, to enrich relationship ...only to be asked if I had read the paper today? Where is the wisdom? Is the very effort folly? (I know it was insanely crazy but was it folly?) One thinks... I thought... when I was a young Mom, I knew what was really important with one foot in the grave...but did I? Did I pour my life into folly? These are the questions on this side of life. More important...what shall I know to be true wisdom? One of the guiding sayings I kept present as our 4 children were growing up was, "Teach them always to gain in wisdom and in grace.." Now, on this side of life, it seems ironic- for what do I know of wisdom? I am just now getting a glimpse of folly. With the psalmist I pray, "Behold, Thou dost desire truth in the innermost being, And in the hidden part Thou will make me know wisdom." ps 51:6

This is my prayer,

but for now,

I am thinking that, just maybe,

folly is the gatekeeper of wisdom.